floating backwards

as we tangle
the cords and our
words over the

bright air
poignant and heavy with the brokenness we all
share
too dark to keep hidden in the corners of our
hearts anymore.
we listen and
listen inward
speak and
speak out.
bravely sobbing on the other end
in this for different reasons
and wanting it to go forward for the same
love
and how do you find
you want the person who wants the same things as your heart?
is the dream real?
how do people compromise so much for love?
risks in the night and stepping right down into fear so vivid your
whole being feels like it is
floating backwards
into
it.

and you survive the emotion.
the compass finally stops swinging
and your pendulum
lands
ah!
this way to clarity!
maybe you don't have the answers yet
on what is just right
or what you will regret
the least
or
decide not to miss out on and
CARPE DIEM
but
maybe
oh maybe
you can twist these cords some more with this one
and find out if the one is yours
or his
or the future's.

conversations into the wires of air.

believer

you believed in me
when
i
couldn't
wouldn't

didn't

believe in myself.


the way your heart reaches out to caress mine
with encouragement
in the
form
of incredulity,
the way your voice goes
high
at the end of
your exclamations!
of sincerity in
The Truth About Who You Are, Melissa.

as you tell me my story,
the lens
focused
and
practiced
in your steady hands,
i feel treasured.
you see me.  the me
i didn't even tell you
the me i just am
and think i so cleverly
hide
from prying spotlights and
agendas out to tear me down.
you see right through the barricade
of
thorns
and
roses
and sparklers!
and puppies
all in motion and beauty
(look over here! over here!)

to the
quiet
of me
that you have seen since you first laid eyes on me
and i
can't
won't

don't

want to do it without you.

join me in my truth, dear love.
i see you back.

forever

"i'm sorry we don't have forever..."

floats in the background of tears filling the eyes of anyone

watching the father dying and the daughter living until

she starts to die.

nothing is permanent.
we take what we
have
and
hold
for granted as it is.

the forever we live in only
feels
endless
because it hasn't ended

habit or consistency, the pulsing of life in the everyday.

rarely is the flower both dead and alive
how the sun does shine
on the living and the dead.

it is your breath.
you choose.