i know

i know there will be pain in my life
i have known pain.

i know that You love me, and your love is stronger than anything i have ever known.

i know that you have purpose and plans for my passion. that you put them in me.

i know this will be hard.

i know you will never leave me and i could never live fully without you in my life. for what kind of life is death without reason? with out love?



you are. i know this.

oh, mr. penn

"true godliness does not turn men out of the world, but enables them to live better in it and excites their endeavors to mend it." -william penn

2/24/08

to be nobody. this is the
way i want to be shown.
the life of nobody. to
influence those who are
myself. like my heart. like
my selfishness, my shame
anger and emptiness. to
give to those who take.
to take from those who
give. to play the victim,
the martyr. the young
one who is taken advantage
of. HOLY FATHER!

let me give and love and
give and love and give and
love endlessly. father
let me empty myself of
all that is not you.
let me be good to the
ones you made me for.
all your children. who do
not realize what they do.
whose they are.

2/17/08

you see us coming from a
mile away

do you see us coming
father?

way off on the horizon
you perceive our
whisper of a thought
begining.

you see us coming
father?

miles and miles
away.
and miles

before we left.

moment

..."i have no idea how to express my care and concern for him except to be praying for him and of course, talk with him whenever he is up for it. i don't think i'll get an opportunity to do that until later this month and i am not sure what will happen then. and i've been telling god i don't even want to know, really. all i want to know is what he wants me to do right now, here, in this day, moment by moment in my doubt and faith, pain and joy, love and confusion. what he wants my response to be, my heart to be. HIS, i know that without question. he has created me to shine for this moment, this situation. all i have to do is let go of my expectations and grab hold of me in my purest form, for He is in that through and through. "