the real wheel deal

for the confusion, speculation and rumors surrounding my bike i'd like to clarify what REALLY happened on September 11, 2007 in the wee hours of the morning under the carport at my house.

riding along in the rain with intent to find a better bike, a stranger pulls into our yard and drops their transportation. it is so early yet that he is glad any dogs nearby aren't paying vigilant gaurd on those who come with unscrupulous business. he swipes at the water running down his face and grins at his genius. this was a good pick, two bike to choose from. he gets the clippers out of his bag and with two clamps it is over, they are his for the taking. first the blue one, it looks about his height but is it what he wants? takes it out for a spin, but the feeling of constantly riding on a sidewalk leads him to a quick rejection. no matter, try the other one. oh yeahh, the green one fits great, comfortable, has everything he needs. ha ha, suckas... helmet, lights, basket, water bottle and holder, tires in good condish, shocks, cush.

he makes quick work of stripping the blue bike of all that might be useful, lights, even tries the seat but it's too rusted. damn '70's schwinn crap. whatever, he's gotta get going. back into the rain, but this time he feels better. i mean hey, a guy can only ride so many bikes at once right? they don't need two good bikes when i only got one crap one.

i'm shakin' the dust of that squeakyshit one off my heels, they can have it for all i care. ha ha, nice try with the locks. some people are so stupid. didn't they notice when i left the light on it a couple night last week? think that was strange? geez, this ride is pretty sweet... wonder what they'll do in the morning, maybe they won't even see it's gone for a couple days. this one is going to be a good story for a long time.




so, that's what happened. now i am holding onto the thief's bike for fingerprints (if the police will give me the time of day, i can hope!) and reporting the stolen bike w/ registration number so if a bike that hot ever makes it to a pawn shop, i'll see it again. i doubt it, but it's all i can do. oh, and if i ever see someone riding it on the street, chase them until they give it back. because damn it i worked hard for that bike! and this is the second time this has happened to me in austin. *sigh*

if you see my bike, let me know: cypress green, GIANT, hybrid, grey plastic crate on the back with a sticker (mass media creates mass deception) and lots of reflective squares (on gray helmet as well).


these are the things i don't understand:
how do you get to a point where it's justifiable to take something that is not yours? not to make a split second bad decision, but to plan it out in advance and carry it through without hesitation?
why are human beings so cruel to one another?
why do we say hurtful things and decide that we deserve so much?
how come we don't point out to eachother our pains and then fix them? or let them be, but not use them as an excuse for poor behavior?

see, i don't think that was the best my bike thief had to give, and that's what i want. i want his best effort, time, compassion, attention, truth. the best. anything less and you're just breathing. i want him to have a better life by making a better life. THAT's hard. it is frustrating and saddening to contemplate that he must have deluded himself to a point mentally where this is ok, going to make him happy and solve some problems in his life. you know what? take my bike. but it's not going to do anything for you. because someday, maybe not anytime soon, but someday, just before you fall asleep, you're going to realize that it didn't do you one damn bit of good, because it came from a bad, empty place in your heart that only wanted to satisfy yourself. and that's as far as he'll get with it. nowhere.

i still wish i had my bike back, but i don't want to loose this lesson. because i could be him any moment i choose. that's all it takes. and that's the real deal WORD.

high heels

i really like high heels. greanted they're not functional(ie. practical) for anything but fashion and showing off one's body, but they do that very nicely. =0) there are so many things in my life that i would like to say i could eliminate and be happy to be down to the bare minimum, the essentials. conflicting feelings bring me back to what dad always taught 'when you're having a tough time making a decision, make a list of pros and cons. it's always helpful to see it written out.' so:



pros:

less stuff

more time to spend on what really matters: god, love, people

focus on the things that are not about me

discover who i am with out all this...



cons:

loose an expression of who i am

uh....



well, the pros win. i do live very simply comparativly, but i think if i boil it all down to this i can figure out my standard of simplicity: live a life where my love speaks louder than anything i could say with clothing, stuff or status. live to be empty, but full to overflowing. i don't have anything to give of myself, because the created is nothing without their creator in every facet of their lives.



i am so unique and exciting, he says.

so terribly dangerous in my willingness to give everything i have for passion

the way i laugh gives him chills, he smiles.



i never knew he thought about me this way. god, why did i think you were far away? you are a part of me, but so much bigger than i can fathom. shoot, you even love the way i talk to you at stop lights.