run out

if only I could run out
of tears
maybe this pain would run out
too.

wringing my breath like my hands
before a test
this test of my
heart
strings
the frustration and helplessness
strings before me
and behind.
miles
and I want it to
run out.
if it can end so can this pain

'be strong melissa'
I whisper through the gasps
for breath as the
noises squeak out of me
like the involuntary love
beating around the anger.
because I can't stop it
at all
and I don't want to loose you and me
and I don't know how to stop from loosing you
when I already have you now.

run away from the old, and into the new
waiting for you
to say no to the emptiness
and
yes to the full
arms waiting for your
aching spirit.

run out.
these tears.

heady

sitting
around watching these flames
smolder and flash me by
consuming themselves and starting again
and again.

our words stand up for what we
believe
scotch and cigars hiding behind
our truths
timeless and our grandchildren will have these moments
I can only hope.

life is too short to spend it doing something you don't love, we conclude as the dirt hits the mound,
and joins pieces of our souls shattered and shared
trying new things and for heavens sake they are all new.
none of us knows
how what we are doing will turn
out
or into the best move of our history.

because all these aromas so rich, pulling with a river of hope so heady
we can't stop ourselves.
life is not for the lonely,
life demands to be met head on with all the gusto and guts we've got.

let it loose!
I am going to live so big!

we are enough.

I am trying not to let this get all out of control.

HUUUUUGE PICTURE
everything feeds into my every
waking
moment
and I am responsible for changing lives(!!!!!!!.)


tame that voice down a
little bit
and whisper it the truth:
life is brevity.

and we are all doing
the best we can to be
ourselves.
and that is good enough.
it is always enough.