if your lip quivers."
(-carmen petrick, e-mail)
the only thing about joblessness is the quivering, really. it's not so bad, but for the uncertainty of a paycheck. this mention from carmen (quoted) was perhaps one of the most astounding things i have read this week. it hit me like a small child crying for attention. you want to pay some mind to it, to assure them they are indeed cared for and uniquely important to you, however you do not want to jump too fast, thus encouraging the behavior.
some of the things i say are like a foreign language.
in the attempt to keep my chin up, i know that it's quivering can be seen. shockingly enough those who notice have only words of comfort and support for me. it is a safe place to quiver, a safe bunch to walk with. even though we all hurt each other as people do, unconditional love covers over these pains with immaculate love that is not from us, but from the father. he is beyond capable, he is more than i can imagine. oh love, oh lord, you have lifted me above these rising storms with your people, your love, your intimacies for my heart. help me not to look down, but keep my quivering chin up towards your face. oh.